Parent and Teacher Conferences

What makes a useful and productive parent-teacher conference? Most schools offer two or more conferences each year where parents and teachers meet to discuss the progress, or lack of progress, students are making. It has gone on for so long it has become a tradition for many parents and teachers. As it turns out, however, a simple visit to talk over a child’s performance has more to it than meets the eye. For instance, the conversation is shortened by the fact that many parents want to visit and teachers often have a line of parents waiting. Sometimes the conference is a bit hurried. It is also the case that quite often the parents whom teachers want most to talk to often do not come. These are the parents whose children have some difficulty with school or parents who had difficulty themselves. They are busy, they feel awkward and perhaps embarrassed, and they might feel they will need to apologize for their children for something they have done or work they have not achieved. Sometimes those who don’t come are from different cultures or ethnically different from teachers and feel awkward communicating in a language they are less familiar with.

Of course it is very important for parents and teachers to communicate about children’s education. But, in addition, much of the time parents want to talk about things that are not on a teacher’s list. Teachers feel obligated to address grades, tests, attendance, and etc. all of which are important. Parents want those too but also often want to discuss children’s social abilities, self concept or esteem, and other emotional qualities. These are usually saved to last and if a discussion is had about them at all, many parents report the conversation is often hurried and incomplete.

What then makes a good parent-teacher conference? These conferences are vastly improved if teachers know parents and something about the family of the child who is a student. They are improved if teachers are well organized (which they usually are) and make time for parental concerns. They are improved if the conference is part of an on going relationship which was created at the beginning of the year. They are improved if teachers send an agenda of possible topics in advance and give parents time to prepare for them. They are improved if parents come with specific questions to ask based on the knowledge they have about how the teacher has structured the classroom, the types of learning activities employed by the teacher, and some things about peer relationships their children experience. They are improved if parents leave with more than good or bad feelings but with some constructive ideas about how to organize their families to promote achievement and their children’s success in the future. One way we can all improve our educational system is first to prepare our children for learning and achievement better than many do and to participate in the process better than we often do.

All this takes a bit more time but the positive impact on the child is worth it. When parents do not have time or are willing to arrange and spend the time then there is less positive impact. Teachers are busy as well and confronted with numerous tasks and a lot of work. If parents and teachers give into their pressures, however, the person who does not benefit is, of course, the child. Like I say, “we can do better,” and for the sake of our children and the future of our nation, we need to.